Feeling down and out through no fault of your own: 5 things you need to stop doing immediately

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Motto: The most beautiful smile is the one that appears through tears.

We can say that Life is neither good nor bad – Life doesn’t care. It certainly does not make allowances for our plans. When I was working with my American partner preparing a specific venture in real estate based on his American contacts and the Czech environment, Mr. Life knocked him down twice in just 24 hours: his wife was diagnosed with cancer in the worst possible place – the pancreas, and his son was subsequently killed in a car crash because he failed to concentrate properly.

These two blows were fatal for him. He found it hard to get up in the morning even when he managed to sleep at night, and there was certainly no chance of him making basic steps necessary for the company’s development. I didn’t put any pressure on him and believed that Mr. Time would help him understand Mr. Life and value every day we are allowed to live.

On the other hand, we could not let our business wait. Also my business partner needed to understand that when you are walking through hell, you mustn’t stop walking. And if life gives you hell, you mustn’t stop living.

As the doctors assumed, his wife did not live long after her diagnosis and my partner ended up coming to the Czech Republic to escape his usual environment. Since then, I have come to understand that Life can knock us down at any time because we can rarely influence the circumstances we encounter. However, these difficulties come with one advantage: As soon as we overcome them, we are better equipped to cope with the next struggle. Our subsequent troubles do not become any smaller but we are bigger.

This is why Life is not good, bad nor cruel. It is exactly the way we see it, the way we can understand it at a specific point. In the end, Life has also taught me that whether we suffer a small loss or a great tragedy, we first need to stop making 5 mistakes. I hope the following words will help all of you who are feeling down and out:

1) Stop hiding from the truth

Many people refuse to admit the truth to themselves at first. They believe that, somehow, something will change; that life comes with a happy ending. No, life does not owe us anything. What’s more, it is important to recognise the truth for one major reason:

When we disregard the truth, it does not cease to exist. On the contrary, ignoring the truth forces us to constantly live a lie. This lie makes every day and every night worse because it deceives us. Try to imagine this: You can see an obstacle in your path. You take a blanket and cover it, as if it doesn’t exist. However, it does exist and you cannot pass through it. You must remove the obstacle, rather than conceal it.

Now I will say something that is not so easy to understand: the truth, no matter how hard, liberates us as soon as we admit it to ourselves. It is important to realise our situation because this is our starting point. And to be able to reach our desired destination, we first need to know the point from which we are starting. What use would a GPS navigation system be if it didn’t know where we are right now?

Example: You have a rotten partner whose lousiness you continue to overlook. You stick to the belief that he will understand how he is hurting you. He will not. It is always better to be hurt by the truth than be lulled into a false sense of security by a lie. An ending with pain is always better than pain without end. The truth only hurts once – before we come to terms with it. However, a lie hurts every time we realise that we have to live it.

2) Why not to be like a tape recorder?

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