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- Start supporting others in their victories.Try to think what you like about other people. They attract you; you start to enjoy being around them; you start to want to imitate them – in that you want to make progress, too. Sooner or later the people you have supported will start supporting you because they can find inspiration in you, too.
- Start seeing the bright side in difficult situations.When the going gets tough and you feel worse, close your eyes and take a deep breath – you’ll feel a flicker of hope. Remind yourself that you can and will get stronger – thanks to these difficult times. What does not kill me makes me stronger – repeat it to yourself. Focus on what you have, not what you are missing. What you have is hope, courage, faith, and light.
- Start forgiving yourself and others.We all tend to be hurt by the decisions we, or others, make. Although the pain from these experiences is normal, it sometimes lasts too long. We focus on the pain again and again and it seems hard to break out of it. However, forgiveness heals. This does not mean that you erase the past, or forget what happened. It means that you learn the lesson and take it with you through life.
- Start being more attentive to your stress levels and take short breaks. Slow down. Breathe. Give yourself permission to take a break. It will help you and you’ll move forward with a clearer mind.
- Start seeing the beauty in the small moments.Instead of waiting for some big events that only happen once in a while – a wedding, baby, graduation, or lottery win – find happiness in the small, everyday pleasures. Your morning cup of coffee, the pleasure of sharing something nice with someone, in your partner’s warm hand that grasps yours. Just admit it, when did you last think about its temperature? Savouring small pleasures on a daily basis can make a great improvement to the quality of your life.
- Start accepting things, even if they’re less than perfect.One of the greatest challenges that people who work on themselves face is accepting things just the way they are. Sometimes it is better to appreciate the world the way it is, and people the way they are, rather than hoping for an impossible ideal. This does not mean that you should be satisfied with the average, but learn to love and appreciate things even if they are less than perfect. Your life will be happier for it.
- Start being more open about how you feel.If you feel hurt, give yourself time and space to experience that pain, to balance it out, and to reconcile yourself and learn from it. Confide in the people closest to you. Tell them the truth about how you feel. Let them hear you out. This simple act of taking the burden off your shoulders and understanding it is the first step towards feeling good again.
- Start taking full responsibility for your life.They are your decisions, your mistakes. So the only way you can remedy them is to make new decisions (even though they might result in new mistakes). You are truly the only person who can directly affect the results in your life. It is not easy to accept such a role. To realise that the series of obstacles awaits you alone. Yes, it’s hard to accept that you can’t influence everything. On the other hand, you can always influence something. So, invest your energy in things that you can influence, and work on what you can.
- Start focussing on positive options.Your mind must believe that you can achieve what you long for, before you are actually able to achieve it. A child can’t yet walk, but he tries anyway – with crazy faith, because he has never not managed it before. Negative thoughts and destructive emotions drain not only your strength, but also your determination to try something positive. Learn to replace every negative thought with a positive one. Regardless of how the situation looks, focus on what YOU WANT to happen, and then take positive steps in that direction. In the long term, whether or not you are happy depends on the perspective from which you view the world.
Remember that Henry David Thoreau, the American philosopher, wrote: ”Wealth is the ability to fully experience life.”
© Petr Casanova