We have a dog. I love watching him.
He is headstrong, but he is sincere in love. He lets everyone know immediately: I like you/I don’t like you.
He never lies. And I have to ask: Why can’t people do this?
When I meet with readers of my first bestseller 250 Laws of Love, we discuss issues that bother them. They confide in me. Every story is different but all of them are noteworthy. Today’s story is about a person that longed to be happy and not to hurt anyone. In the end, she was unhappy and hurt everyone, including herself.
Stage 1: Jelly bean
She had been married for years. Her and her husband had only one problem – in the bedroom. She suffered: Is he tired of me? Has he stopped enjoying it? What should I do to be attractive for him again? She had hang-ups from this.
But she wasn’t alone in this. Whenever she tried to open this topic and discuss it with her husband frankly, he rejected her grumpily – perhaps he felt like a non-man, useless.
She needed to satisfy her natural need. So… she found herself a lover.
Suddenly she was satisfied – she had the only thing that was missing with her husband. The husband also calmed down because she stopped putting pressure on him at once. He did not ask why; he was simply happy that the problem had disappeared.
However, this was not the case. A problem not resolved actively is like a jelly bean left on a pavement. While lying in a puddle, it starts to swell.
Stage 2: Handle on a jug
The problem did not swell with the husband or wife but with the woman’s lover. He genuinely loved her and perhaps that was the reason why their lovemaking was so good. However, because he loved her, he soon wanted more – he wanted to be her partner.
But the woman already had a partner and did not want to lose him. After all, he had 75 percent of what she wished for in a man. But she did not want to lose her lover either. After all, he had the 25 percent that the husband was missing.
She did not want to give up either of them, so she lied to both. She told her husband that she did not have a lover and told her lover that she would divorce. It is only a matter of time before the handle on the overloaded jug breaks.
This happens differently each time. In this case, the lover sought out the husband to ask him plainly about the situation with the divorce, since it was dragging on so long. The husband was shocked and the lover was shocked. Within a minute, the woman was standing on two burnt sites.
She did not want to lose her husband or her lover, so she lost both.
Now she was sitting opposite me, holding her head and defending herself. “I only wanted to be happy, to have a hundred percent,” she explained. “Should I have stayed unhappy with my husband? Should I have broken up our marriage because of a single problem?”
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